put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
