i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
YAS. BRING CRAB.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize