It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
