I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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