Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He better not be in your backpack
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize