You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
