I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize
