She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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