drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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