Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
