You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
She's the barista slut.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
