I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
