Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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