You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP