Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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