Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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