Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
