Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Randomize