It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
