I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
