East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
i believe in u and ur pee
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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