Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize