Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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