So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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