what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
