she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
