I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you win again, gameday.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
