do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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