I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize