cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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