A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
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you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
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How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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