god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
