she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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