i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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