Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
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with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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