Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Small penises have feelings too.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
