Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
