just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I need to sanitize my soul.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
