I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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