She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
PANTIES FOUND
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