im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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