similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
