The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
