glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
