Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize