My liver just broke up with me...
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
where am i from again
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
