I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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