Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
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we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
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And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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