this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
