we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
