Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
